Friday, March 20, 2009

Repentence of Sexual Abuser

Why is sexual abuse of a child different than any other? Aren’t all sins alike?

No, the consequence of sin differs according to severity of the violation. Take for example the sins of gossip and murder. Gossip results in emotional pain for someone, murder costs a life.

Child sexual abuse costs a child his or her innocence, creates permanent feelings of fear, low self-esteem and interferes with intimacy in future adult relationships. The damage done by a sexual abuse never goes away.

Forgiveness of a child sexual abuser can never include trust with a child. If we do we are putting what we believe is the welfare of the abuser before the safety of the child. In essence we are sacrificing the child to the emotional desire of the abuser.

Sexual abuse is like an alcoholic. A person who has a physical dependence on alcohol can never have one drink. To stay sober, they must forever abstain from alcohol.

A sexual abuser has a deep seeded wound that draws him to the manipulation and abuse of children. God’s forgiveness takes that into consideration and requires the abstinence of being alone with a child.

A person who has truly repented from sexual abuse has no desire to be alone with children. They are fully aware of the potential and avoid the temptation at any cost. If the person you love was a sexual abuser and now requires that you trust him or her with children, the request is more about proving themselves than about the safety of the child. He or she has not fully grasped the seriousness of neither his or her actions nor the danger for themselves or the child.